With less than a week left of classes, the Editorial Board was preparing to drive home for the holidays. We had packed our bags, finished our final papers and used the last of our money to fill the gas tank.

But our plans were thwarted when we realized that getting home would cost almost $20 on the Florida Turnpike. And we didn't want to take U.S. Highway 27. That road is just scary.

We were outraged. Does the Turnpike's upkeep really cost 7.5 cents per mile, per car, per trip? It's just another way for The Man to keep us down.

However, we stopped short of taking advantage of the gap in the toll system, through which SunPass users can cut their costs down by skipping a toll. Instead, we've decided to hitchhike home and face the risk of seedy drivers. We're just that dedicated to our ethics, even if The Man is a crook who wants to rob us blind.

The Turnpike might lighten our wallets, but legal theft in Gainesville will bleed us dry. We shoot a higher-gas-prices-should-cut-out-of-huge-profits-not-out-of-our-dwindling-paycheck DART to the Gainesville City Commission for approving an $8 hike in towing rates Monday.

We understand why the towing companies constantly try to raise their fee: They're glorified criminals. Paying a visit to their offices feels like walking into the bowels of the Mafia.

The City Commission should protect our interests. Gas prices and insurance costs do not come close to justifying an $84 fee. If upkeep has increased a little, towing companies should take the chunk out of their high profits. We're sick of this roam-towing anarchy.

The women of we-knew-it-was-a-lie-but-it-unfortunately-took-a-man-to-reveal-the-truth LAUREL to sex educator Jay Friedman for bursting the myth of blue balls. Anyone who's been pressured to finish the job because of this "medical" reason can now sit back and laugh while the guy squirms. It's a beautiful thing.

We also enjoyed Friedman's oversized condoms. That's always fun despite-popular-belief-the-Alligator-doesn't-carry-all-the-news-of-the-world LAUREL to Student Government for continuing the New York Times/USA Today Readership Program. It's the best thing to come out of SG and actually educates the student body.

But SG never gets off that why-can't-the-idea-of-a-sustainable-budget-enter-the-heads-of-those-in-charge DART at SG for funding the $45,000 program from reserves for the third year in a row. We want a plan worked out for the future that doesn't include last-minute solutions.

This is cache, read story here